You want whipped cream with that?

I had a conversation recently about campus pranks and their evolution when one reaches the world beyonfd university. I was never the biggest fan of pranks, though I appreciated a first year skirmish between my dorm and another in which we placed live goldfish in the toilets of a dorm that contained a girl terrified of fish. The retaliation was a beautiful marble cake baked with those tiny toilet goldfish baked right in. It was fun. But I don't think I have the right temperament for tht sort of life. I don't think I'd be very good at it. There isn't any appeal for me anymore for things like, say, taking my roommate's underwear, soaking it in koolaid, and placing it in the freezer. When confronted with the idea of pranksterism, I automatically change gears straight to vandalism. "I've been pranked... there can be only one response: I must set fire to his bed." I think something is wrong with me. Perhaps it's been too long and I need to work myself in slowly. Switch all his cd's around in their jewel cases at first. Then I'll work my way up to putting his stapler in jello... or something. Or not. Most likely, I will simply continue to live a prankless life, which is probably for the best. I'd hate to get carried away and accidentally burn down my own apartment.